Over the years, I’ve come to believe that most of Hollywood has lost its spark. Creativity has waned and original ideas are trampled. What was once fresh and new has been tossed carelessly in the mud and left to rot.
Regurgitated ideas and remakes abound. The same story told and retold with different actors, technology, and scenery. But it’s still the same basic storyline.
(This thought does not cover movies based on books, but even that means that it wasn’t a script first, but a novel, which equals, still, an unoriginal idea.)
If all Hollywood is capable of is remakes, than I have a few suggestions for them.
The first of course, is Spawn. But I’ve already covered that.
Cocoon – the 1985 movie about elderly citizens dipping into what they believe to be a “fountain of youth” but is actually where aliens having been storing their cocooned brethren
The NeverEnding Story (which, despite its name, there was only one of) – the 1984 movie about a young boy that gets lost in the world of Fantasia and has to help save their world from “The Nothing” that threatens it
The Princess Bride – the 1987 epic fantasy tale of a beautiful princess and her one true love battling evil in the mythical kingdom of Flori in order to be together
Labyrinth – Jim Henson’s 1986 vision of a sister traversing a maze to save her brother after he was kidnapped by the Goblin King
Legend – the 1985 tale of Darkness’s attempt to cast eternal night on a world filled with unicorns, dwarfs, and magic swamps
The Exorcist – the 1973 horror movie that needs no introduction or explanation. A cult classic. A tale of a young girl possessed by the devil and her subsequent exorcism.
The Guyver – the 1991 sc-fi thriller. It is the tale of when alien bio-armor is fused into the body of an ordinary man, turning him part cyborg, part alien, and part human. Hey, doesn’t this happen to every boy during puberty anyway?
Avatar, the Last Airbender – was originally a wonderful Nickelodeon series turned movie that was murdered in 2010 by M. Night Shymalalalaalalananan. (Please note the very intentional mispelling of his name. If he butcher movies, than I can butcher his name.) This is one that deserves another chance. Aang, the last Airbender, tries to restore harmony to the nations of Air, Earth, Water, and Fire. (I took personal offense to his rendition. This is one of my favorite series.)
There are, of course, other movies that I’d like to see remade. But I think this is a start. And if the wrong person gets their hands on these, it could spell disaster. So, please, Hollywood, if you’re going to take another swing at these, do them justice.
And, if it’s not too much to ask, I’d like a sequel to The Nightmare Before Christmas. Not a remake. A sequel. I love the original and would be pissed if someone messed with it.
Wouldn’t any of these be better than another Sharknado?